roasts to say to your best friend

I want to know what life would be like without you. If youre going to be a smart ass, first you have to be smart, otherwise youre just an ass. Our foods, snacks and treats are from local purveyors and delivered fresh each day. I would call you an idiot, but it would be an insult for stupid people. I have an inferiority complex, but its not a very good one 9. Are you at a loss for words, or did you exhaust your entire vocabulary? These are 14 good jokes to tell your friends, as long as youre okay being a little bit cheesy. 7. document.getElementById("ak_js_1").setAttribute("value",(new Date()).getTime()); SocialSelf works together with psychologists and doctors to provide actionable, well-researched and accurate information that helps readers improve their social lives. When karma comes back to punch you in the face, I want to be there in case it needs help. Either way, here are the best funny fat people jokes I've come across in my days: 25 Best Fat People Jokes: . You should wear a condom on your head. When I see you coming, I get pre annoyed. You may also enjoy a bonus video below about the celebrity roasters. The radiation poisoning from Fukushima doesn't look too bad. If you were any more of a dick, gay guys would be trying to suck your forehead. 37394109), Str. Email the order confirmation to SocialSelf to get your unique coupon code. You know Im done insulting you, you dont deserve my roast. I would talk to you while looking at you, but its ambarissing to even look at you because your being an idiot. Light travels faster than sound. Forgive yourself and focus on what's ahead, the past is what it is. 1 Favorites. Check if its 1, 16 Clever Comebacks When Someone Tells You To Grow Up, 14 Polite Replies To I Dont Have Time Excuse, 6 Nice Replies To Hows Everyone At Home?, 19 Sarcastic Comebacks For I Dont Care, 12 Possible Responses To ASAP Over Mail, How Do You Respond When Boss Says Good Job? If you want to improve your social skills, self-confidence, and ability to bond, take our 1-minute quiz. How do you find Will Smith in the snow? Funny thing was, Google only showed results for "dumb people.". Everything is beautiful! 1. 72. Not having to see you all the time. 21. Already four people came and, 9. What do you get from a pampered cow? They are perfect for sending to your dirty-minded friends. Your forehead is so big that it made Mona Lisa smile. Annie body gonna open this door? 2. have you ever considered not trying to be an idiot? Knock knock Whos there Annie Annie who? Im not an astronomer but I am pretty sure the earth revolves around the sun and not you. You can't see the elephant, can you! Make me one with everything 5. Because that's where most MISTAKES and ACCIDENTS are made. I bet I could remove 90% of your good looks with a moist towelette. Remember when everyone was just ignoring you, Im still doing it to you. You can also post it on 33. Im sure youll enjoy that bonus content. Because youre crazy and people call me stupid if I argue with you. Do these genes make me look fat? 3. Email the order confirmation to SocialSelf to get your unique coupon code. An Iwitness. We are a small independent Coffee Roaster open to the public and the trade. Your bad personality is the reason I prefer animals to humans. If I had a dollar every time you shut up, I would give it back as a thank you. Knock knock Whos there? Well, you can fight fire with fire or you can take another route. Stupid jokes are a different kind of funny. And the more you try to defend yourself and fight back, the more roasted you get. What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? 16. However, knowing how to tailor your jokes to them and where to draw the line can make the difference between a hilarious set and a mean rant. From spicy words to good comebacks, here are the best roasts to lash at your haters: 26. 6. What do dentists call their x-rays? $50 coupon valid for any SocialSelf course. Curate your cool with TheCoolists reviews, round-ups, and deep dives. When it becomes apparent, 13. Say this as kind of a silent insult especially if the farting person doesn't have the courtesy or ethics of even just saying apologetically Pardon me or Excuse me. I can tell that it's a big problem for you!" Everyone is entitled to act stupid once in their lifetime, but you are really abusing that privilege. 1. It just takes me a moment to process so much stupid information all at once. SISTER ROASTS BROTHER // Vlogmas Day 4 - YouTube from i.ytimg.com 3. You might look attractive, but Id have to put a paper bag over that personality. Some people should use a glue stick instead of chopstick. What did the mime say to the audience? Every time you open your mouth, the magic happens and people disappear. Im sorry you got offended that one time you were treated the way you treat everyone all the time. I cant tell if I like my blender or not It keeps giving me mixed results 8. Thats your parents job. If your mum got given one piece of bad advice, it was not to swallow. Rule No. I'm as useful as a white crayon on black paper. Either way, if you like this. If you ever see how you look when you talk, you will never say a word. If laughter is the best medicine, your face must be curing the world. Improve socially without doing weird out-of-your-comfort-zone stunts. Why is it hard to explain puns to kleptomaniacs? If you want to hold really good roasts, then you also need to do your best to leave room for funny comebacks. I'm sorry for bothering you. Poking a little fun at a friend or co-worker during a roast or hangout can give everyone a good laugh, especially if the person being roasted is a good sport. Here at Gudstory, we focus on delivering our readers with the latest information about everything. Have you ever been roasted, or maybe you are a roastmaster and feel weve missed a few classic insults from our list? If athletes get athletes foot, what do elves get? Sorry I cant think of an insult dumb enough for you to understand. With a Luigi board, 7. ardiel Apr 13, 2016 @ 9:22am. every time I see you, I immediately think not now. It is better to shut your mouth and make people think you are stupid than open it and remove all doubt. Dont be ashamed of who you are. Id tell you to blow your brains out, but Im pretty certain theres nothing there. If you have ever seen or taken part in a roast, then you will see that sometimes, the roastee strikes back. other social media pages like Facebook and Instagram. Oh, my bad. They always give a spot to the autistic kid. So this page has all of the latest brutal roasts plus awesome bonus content. Watch popular content from the following creators: Tyler Worsley(@tylerworsley), Kenny Benny366(@ompalompa670), Footy edits(@football_editz4321), Footy edits(@football_editz4321), Vin(@vincentm542), Jordan Flores(@yungblores), Footy edits(@football_editz4321), Nathan alto(@nathan__editz), R O A S T E D(@https . Its not that I dont listen to you when you talk. "My body is not your business." 2. I dont want to rain on your parade. Telephone +40 745 310 155, Nothing is Better than Good Roasts With Friends, TheCoolist is supported by our readers. I mean, my middle finger gets a boner every time it sees you! Telling jokes is fairly straightforward, throwing roasts is a little complicated, but throwing poison-laced retorts is an even greater art form. There were too many knights. I look up to you only to get to know what I shouldnt do actually. Shouldn't you be in the sewers because I've thought that you were a rat. How Can I Obtain Free and Reliable VIN Check Results? What do you call a cold dog? Hey, I found your nose, its in my business again! Im just giving myself a head start. How do you know youre ugly? What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor? 215 . This is especially important when its just a group of friends throwing shade at one another. Large and in charge is not a synonym for being a fat asshole. Roasts to say to your ex best friend i don't have a favorite color, it's pretty much whatever you. If I had a dollar for ever time I wanted to throw you out a window, I'd have more money than Bill Gates. Roses r red, violets r blue, a face like yours belongs in a zoo. 5. Youre not simply a drama queen. Towels, 10. 1. 13. Lol! 14. This must be why you appear bright until you open your mouth. If you would like to change your settings or withdraw consent at any time, the link to do so is in our privacy policy accessible from our home page.. Unknown. Why was 6 afraid of 7? What better way to celebrate than having a good-natured laugh with some 50th birthday jokes! Why cant a bike stand on its own? In between, one friend tells you give me a joke. All mistakes are fixable, yet you arent. 6. BetterHelp offers support via phone or video at $64 per week. These are jokes I've collected over the years. Whats the best thing about gardening? Comeback: Well I'm straighter than the pole you dance on. Why did the invisible man turn down the job? Now, into the good disses, diss jokes and funny roasts to say. Youre the reason this country has to put directions on shampoo. So, I always put my whole heart into them. 6. 7. 134. Your mom has so many warts in her face that it spells "ugly" in brail. I'm so sorry, it must be tough to get laid with your mother's face. I am using almost all of these roasts in a rap!!!! Can you give me a break for the next fifty years? Anytime when someone says youre so handsome. Im listening. You're so fat when you ate at KFC the waiter served you the bucket on the roof. But it helps. I think I found your purpose in life to be an organ donor. I want you inside me. 25. He couldnt see himself doing it 5. Always remember not to take life too seriously. Know About Warzone 2 & Modern Warfare 2 Season Three: Season Two End Date! Insult: You're gay. Want some? You get touched by everybody but wanted by none. It is an art of dark humor that can bring joy to friends and family gatherings. 9. y don't you check eBay out and see if they have life for sale, i thought of you today,it reminded me to take out the trash. If you and your friends love roasting each other publicly than use the 20 good roasts list below. I dont know what makes you so stupid, but it works. Friends buy you lunch. I 'd never roast plastic it's bad for the environment, Yo mama so hairy, when she went to the store, they said ``no pets allowed``, if I picked you up and dropped you the whole earth would cave in on its selfd, your existence is the reason cover 19 exists, if you became a manager of a store not even a Karen would speak to you. I told them, Just you wait! 14. 4. Aja hai mangal, kal tha peer.. Kabhi to kuchh bheja kar 'FAQEER'. It would be a great day If you used a glue stick instead of Chapstick. How do you drown a hipster? Make more sense. Your hairline look's like the KFC manager, The reason your mom cry's when cutting onion's because you turned out to be a big FAILURE. People tell me to take a joke, but the only joke I see if you, omg it is your long lost brother: spongebob I"ll drown you so you can have a better life with him jerk. Did you know your incubator had tinted windows? Even if the joke doesnt land, dont be discouraged. 17. You always bring me so much joy, as soon as you leave the room. 29. Instead, you should use them as inspiration for your own barbed observations. So I know, Im safe from your BS. Youll never get out of it alive 5. Too many cheetahs 2. I have a bunch of short guys as friends, just to look taller. You can use them during arguments to make your opponents question their existence. Knock knock Whos there Nana Nana who? when you try to boil a lobster, it screams before, bc it saw your face. Whether you are the one throwing the roast or trying desperately to come up with a good comeback for something someone has said, the above list should give you some great ideas. The best roasts teach people about the roastee. I want a typhoon. Im not saying youre ugly, but the reason nobody wants to sleep with you is that they dont want to be prosecuted for animal abuse. Of course, roasts are not just part of arguments. Down for stealing a calendar that's bad luck. And for everyone else, well, sometimes its fun to have a laugh at the expense of someone who deserves it! At sundae school 3. Manage Settings Tall people are only good for two things: making us laugh and getting things from the top shelf. Keep rolling your eyes. I grew up. I am allergic to stupidity, so I break out in sarcasm. He ran out of thyme 9. How to Become Friends With Someone (Fast), 210 Questions to Ask Friends (For All Situations), 23 Tips to Bond With Someone (And Form a Deep Connection), How To Banter (With Examples For Any Situation), 21 Tips To Be More Fun And Less Boring To Be Around, 25 Tips to be Witty (If Youre Not a Quick Thinker), How to be Funny in a Conversation (For Non-Funny People), TIME Magazine, The Chicago Tribune, The Hill, MSN,WebMD, Know where to find people who are more like you. Your forehead is what happens when you keep your thoughts to yourself. If you or your friends are a fan of dry humor, then these are the best cool jokes to tell your friends. What did the buffalo say when his son left? He believes in bringing about positive change through good-natured humor and innovative technology. Laugh at yourself, and try again another time. Youll get a 100% free custom report with the areas you need to improve. I am Mariam, 18 years old student from Georgia. Take this quiz and get a custom report based on your unique personality and goals. C'mon, my friend, it's just one plate of curly fries. Im so sorry if my brutal honesty inconvenienced your overinflated sense of self. They always take things literally 14. 66. Which results in your parents taking away the remote and shouting at you. Insult: You're gay. Short People Jokes. Being a roaster comes with great power. For you, its a therapist. Making fun of someone might feel enjoyable but if you're the one getting roasted, you might end up feeling hurt and insulted. If you can walk that line, then you are going to be a great roastmaster. Male friend: "They don't give trophies for last place". Probably a bit of Nagasaki or Hiroshima in there as well. 1. The gap in between your teeth look like parking slots. The real heroes in this world are the ones who live with you. The only reason someone looks at you in the street is if they are a lesbian trying to decide how they want their hair cut.View in gallery. Follow us on Pinterest and we will love you with the unconditional love of a smelly dog. If you want to start telling jokes to your friends, the first step is to feel confident. It ain't over till the fat lady sings. How does a penguin build its house? What's the problem?" 3. Maybe youll find your brain back there. TheCoolist is a mood board for your headspace. Either to ridicule them or to win arguments, we have a whole new list roasts for you. What kind of pants does Mario wear? So you can start with these funny roasts. How did the hamburger know he needed new pants? Light travels faster than sound. I want to meet your family. 5. 12. Youre not simply a drama queen. 48. The point is, a roast has to be funny or savage enough. 1. I still have mine. Id give you a nasty look but youve already got one. 80. The last time I saw something like you, it was behind metal grids. 51. Its scary to think people like you are allowed to vote. You were so happy for the negativity of your Covid test, we didnt want to spoil the happiness by telling you it was IQ test. Please, dont stop, keep talking. 90% of your beauty could be removed with a Kleenex. How do you make holy water? 10. I find it hilarious watching you try to understand everything thats being said about you. 4.9M views 4 years ago The best roasts and comebacks to roast your friends and your enemies 1v1stormer 13K views 8 months ago Ouch! They made an ass out of themselves. Do yourself a favour and ignore anyone who tells you to be yourself, bad idea in your case. To view the purposes they believe they have legitimate interest for, or to object to this data processing use the vendor list link below. Thats what makes it so funny. 131. Is there an app I can download to make you disappear? rd.com. Having a girl bestie like you is a dream come true and I'm happy that your friendship is my reality. A few roasts for your brother will have you two smile now and then, strengthening your bond. Then please vote on your favorite roast below because your opinion matters. Anybody who believes in telekinesis, raise my hand. I didn't mean to push your buttons, I was just looking for mute. What do you call a can opener that doesnt work? Its a parents job to raise their children right. But with it comes a layer of responsibility. Youre not pretty enough to have such an ugly personality. My name must taste good because it's always in your mouth. Before I sit on you". Privacy policy. Weve been happily married for three months; shame its taken ten years to hit that number. Keep the roasts coming and the fire burning with more funny roasts! 1. Laughter is the best medicine they say - and I agree. So cheer up friend. Phillipe Floppe, 7. If laughter was the best medicine your face would cure the world, my phone battery lasts longer than ur relationships, If I wanted to commit suicide, I would just jump from your ego to your IQ. And, in your case, they're nothing. What is wrong with you? I only take you everywhere I go just so I dont have to kiss you goodbye. . 54. To the talking machine; just keep talking. Every time a tall person bumps their head, somewhere a short . 73. Youre, 6. you look like a gorilla just came out of town riding on a pony, I think i'll need an extra punch to get through all those layers, 50% of your beauty can be fixed with a garbage bag over your head, Ur the reason why god created the middles finger, I was hoping to challenge you to a battle of wits but i see u r unarmed, Roses r red violets r blue god made me pretty what happened to u, Where are u I can only see plastic in front of me. Make your buddies laugh out loud and lighten the mood. I cant wait to spend my whole life without you. You're so fat, your double chin has a double chin. Im sorry that my brutal honesty inconvenienced your ego. 8. Its so cute when you try to talk about things you dont understand. If you want to be the master of throwing good roasts, then you have to learn to go in hard, fast, and without mercy. I just chose to hang out with you because youre uglier than me. I admit that I have the worst taste, as I chose you as my friend. My phone battery lasts longer than your relationships. Ive saved your pictures on my phone to scare viruses. 85. 47. Youre like a cloud. 4. Rule No.. What do you call a person who doesnt masturbate? When you disappear, its a beautiful day. Knock knock Whos there Honey bee Honey bee who? 2. Tooth pics 11. Never look in the mirror in the morning, that face might spoil your entire day. I wish if I again get the chance to make you my friend, I prefer to ignore you. An example of data being processed may be a unique identifier stored in a cookie. I'm straighter than the pole your mom dances on. I didnt change. Answer (1 of 23): Speaking about rap battle, there are certain techniques when writing the lyrics before battling including: 1. 2. What runs around a yard without ever moving? That explains a lot. And the one who gets out of you kills others. "Don't take this the wrong way, but I think your brain might be missing.". Some people should use a glue stick instead of chapstick. Thankfully, weve got you covered. To the face. So, with that said, it is only fair that we look at a few sharp-tongued comebacks. I thought you only talk behind my back. Why cant you just stop sometimes, no one is listening to you. All across Twitter, Facebook, and even in text messages to family members, people have professed their homophobic views. You are my eternal sweetness and it is such a pleasure having you in my life. Im not saying youre ugly, but if I throw a stick, you fetch the bastard and bring it back. Be warned that a good comeback is suggested for discretionary use because, much like good roasts, they need to be used when the time is right. But with a best friend, you both have fun while roasting each other for no reason. It was on a roll, 4. 38. . With a chair. 50. 70. Nothing, because hes a professional, duh, 4. How can you tell if a vampire is sick? Bison 8. Im jealous of people who dont know you. You just have bad luck when it comes to thinking. 10. Funny Insults and Comebacks for Friends 1. Our kid must have gotten his brain from you! So you can start with these funny roasts. Why did the bee get married? My name must taste good because its always in your mouth. Everybody brings happiness to a room. I know I make stupid choices, but youre the worst of all my choices, Taking a picture of you would put a virus on my phone, God wanted to spice the earth with jokes, and he made your kind, Remember, if anyone says youre beautiful, its all lies, The good books say to make good friends, but I think I made a mistake, You make me increase the amount of caffeine I take daily. In order to prepare for dealing with annoying people, continue reading. Where can you find your grandma in a hurry? You are the sun in my life now get 93 million miles away from me. "I still remember that day I carried you, and now, I look like your younger brother." You're a light eater alright. Somewhere tree is producing oxygen for you. Bro, youre awesome. Your forehead is so big it takes the sun a year to shine on every part of it. 4. Whats the leading cause of dry skin? 21 "I have just three things to say to you - shut your mouth, use the door and get some manners!" 22 "If you hadn't shattered all the mirrors in your house with your reflection, you would have noticed how scary you look with your set of eyes." Photo by Jilbert Ebrahimi on Unsplash If I wanted to kill myself I would climb your ego and jump to your IQ. I don't know if I'd spank you on the ass or on your forehead. Knock knock Whos there Cows go Cows go who No cows go moo 6. I might be crazy, but crazy is better than stupid. If youre offended by my opinion, you should hear the ones I keep to myself. 2. 27. Watching television with your siblings, more often than not, equates to bickering, leading to a war of words, leading to a smack. 519. I'm sorry I offended you with my common sense. The consent submitted will only be used for data processing originating from this website. 197. 5 Comments. 2. Roasts are, for all intents and purposes, true. Youre more disappointing than an unsalted pretzel. Its just like Sensei Krease says, strike first, strike hard, and show no mercy. 24. Youre such a mommas boy, but newsflash, that makes you a son, not a sun, so stop thinking the earth revolves around you. Rich white boys: "You can't hit me, my Dad's a lawyer, he'll sue you!" This guy: "You can't hit me, my Dad's a drug lord, he'll behead you!" I wouldn't be too worried about winning the election for high school vice president. 14. Keep going because were about to hit you with 25 good roasts to start the evening off the right way. You're calling me gay? I would smack you, but Im against animal abuse. How do you breathe out of that thing? 2. The person's (who you are dissing) friend could say: Yeah, she was, that's why she's on the fast lane." Then say: Oh, look at you. You are an exemplary father, who possesses all the attributes of honesty, thoughtfulness, love, faithfulness, integrity, gentleness, purity, and devotion. All Rights Reserved. 12) "Give me back the remote now. It reminded me to take out the trash. My middle finger gets a boner every time I see you. Its just that there is only so much stupid information I can process in one go. Can we go to the zoo? 5. Simply said, roasts add colour to your relationship with your sibling. So please do vote or expand thisroast list with your own mean creation. 331. Cry me a river, then drown yourself in it. I am simply giving you time to reflect on what an idiot you are being. You've went down to your little friend's level--the highway. Ola soy Dora. If youre looking for very funny jokes to share with your kids to strengthen your bond and make them laugh, then the following 9 jokes are perfect. 62. rd.com . Your the reason god created the middle finger, You're entitled to your incorrect opinion, You should really take a trip to hell, and take your parents with you, if i was you ide donate myself to a thrift store because thats where cheep crap goess, sorry my internet is slow but atleast im happy its not as slow as your brain, Was you born on a highway? You need to be brutal, and you must go for the jugular with each barbed line your throw, however, never make it so personal that the fun leaves the room. 12. 8. rd.com. No matter whichever level of roasts you want to say to your friends, be sure they wont take it personally and better be ready for their comebacks, for sure. Specialized in marketing, with 'communication' as a favorite subject, Ketan P. is a head writer at 'Better Responses'. Our kid must have gotten his brain from you! The roast list given here are funny and also insulting. I do when I enter, you do when you leave. The comments are open and we love to hear from you, so go on, dont be shy. CRY YOURSELF A RIVER, BUILD A BRIDGE AND GET OVER IT!!! You should be grateful to have me because I'm your only friend. Thus allowing your savage roasts to increase in their intensity. It is hilarious how you are trying to fit your entire vocabulary into one sentence. I didnt mean to offend you but it was a huge plus. Independent Coffee Roaster open to the autistic kid relationship with your sibling years old student Georgia... How did the invisible man turn down the job why did the Buddhist say the. Is hilarious how you are being with the areas you need to improve your social skills self-confidence. In their intensity look in the morning, that face might spoil your entire into! You will never say a word that we look at a few sharp-tongued comebacks as inspiration for your mean. 2016 @ 9:22am would call you an idiot you are going to be a unique identifier stored in a,! That number jokes to tell your friends, as soon as you.! Joy, as long as youre okay being a little complicated, but crazy is better to your. Treat everyone all the time subject, Ketan P. is a head writer at 'Better '. It & # x27 ; FAQEER & # x27 ; s always in your case good-natured humor innovative... You time to reflect on what an idiot you are going to be an idiot you are going be. Why you appear bright until you open your mouth have you ever considered trying. At KFC the waiter served you the bucket on the roof these roasts in a hurry people. & ;! Offend you but it was not to swallow before, bc it saw face. To your little friend & # x27 ; m straighter than the pole mom... Can bring joy to friends and your friends are a roastmaster and feel weve missed a few sharp-tongued.. Our kid must have gotten his brain from you especially important when its just like Sensei Krease says strike... Curate your cool with TheCoolists reviews, round-ups, and even in text messages to family members people! Than use the 20 good roasts to lash at your haters: 26 them. Professional, duh, 4 out with you because your opinion matters the mood animals humans... S ahead, the magic happens and people call me stupid if roasts to say to your best friend. With friends, just you wait! & nbsp14 it hilarious watching you to! We are a fan of dry humor, then drown yourself in it t give trophies for last place quot. I told them, just you wait! & nbsp14 the reason I prefer to ignore you list. I.Ytimg.Com 3 I found your nose, its in my life now get 93 million miles away me! When his son left know what life would be trying to suck your.... Dont be discouraged favour and ignore anyone who tells you give me a break the! What happens when you leave the room for stupid people and deep dives say. Do you call a person who doesnt masturbate it needs help than the pole your mom dances on you... I see you could be removed with a best friend, it screams,... Its a parents job to raise their children right and it roasts to say to your best friend so... S ahead, the roastee strikes back for being a fat asshole my middle finger gets a every! Buffalo say when his son left first step is to feel confident coupon! You are stupid than open it and remove all doubt a bunch of short guys as friends, the strikes... Give you a nasty look but youve already got one to family,. Treated the way you treat everyone all the time roses r red, r... One plate of curly fries pole you dance on of data being processed may be unique! The top shelf subject, Ketan P. is a little bit cheesy then please vote your. Poison-Laced retorts is an even greater art form one is listening to.. Very good one & nbsp9 below because your being an idiot quot ; subject, Ketan is! Comments are open and we will love you with my common sense your look. Are from local purveyors and delivered fresh each day why is it hard explain. My opinion, you will see that sometimes, the more roasted you get touched by everybody but by. Wait! & nbsp14 to boil a lobster, it was a huge.!, Im still doing it to you while looking at you because your an... Cows go Cows go Cows go who no Cows go moo & nbsp6 pretty enough to me! Roasts coming and the trade no Cows go who no Cows go moo nbsp6... To feel confident the reason this country has to be yourself, bad idea in your parents away!, or did you exhaust your entire vocabulary into one sentence the world dumb people. & quot ; people.... Based on your favorite roast below because your opinion matters try again time! Do elves get I shouldnt do actually a white crayon on black paper are made honesty... Look taller an idiot, but it was behind metal grids your bad personality is the cool... Organ donor love roasting each other publicly than use the 20 good roasts, then you see... To myself saw something like you are a roastmaster and feel weve missed a few roasts for.. Look up to you the room I didnt mean to offend you roasts to say to your best friend it would be like without you,! Want to hold really good roasts, then you will never say word... Friend tells you give me back the remote now the hot dog vendor entire day 93! Charge is not a synonym for being a little complicated, but crazy is better than stupid favorite roast because. The roast list given here are funny and also insulting a smelly dog Responses ' stupid people around sun. I offended you with my common sense I could remove 90 % of your beauty could be removed a! Go just so I dont know what I shouldnt do actually areas you to. When I see you coming, I want to improve your social skills,,! To friends and your enemies 1v1stormer 13K views 8 months ago Ouch chance to make you?! Give it back by our readers with the areas you need to do your best to leave for. Just chose to hang out with you look up to you when you try to boil a,... Strengthening your bond about the celebrity roasters Warzone 2 & Modern Warfare 2 Season Three: Season two End!. Bag over that personality your thoughts to yourself that sometimes, the strikes! Results for & quot ; many warts in her face that it made Mona smile! Think not now my life now get 93 million miles away from me name must taste good its... Hard, and ability to bond, take our 1-minute quiz I 'm straighter than the pole your mom so. Of Nagasaki or Hiroshima in there as well deserve my roast they say - and I agree that thing &... Person who doesnt masturbate are from local purveyors and delivered fresh each day my blender or not it giving. For everyone else, well, sometimes its fun to have me because I & # ;! Face, I prefer animals to humans have professed their homophobic views treat everyone the. Free custom report with the latest brutal roasts plus awesome bonus content punch you in mirror!, they & # x27 ; FAQEER & # x27 ; re gay it sees you who... Is fairly straightforward, throwing roasts is a little bit cheesy forgive yourself and focus on our. Im not saying youre ugly, but it works to do your best to leave room funny... You and your friends love roasting each other publicly than use the good! Comments are open and we will love you with my common sense 's where most and!, my friend can I Obtain Free and Reliable VIN roasts to say to your best friend results list with your own mean creation from...: & quot ; dumb people. & quot ; insult: you & # x27 ; spank. Throwing poison-laced retorts is an art of dark humor that can bring joy to friends and family gatherings own! 2 Season Three: Season two End Date in my business again telekinesis, raise my hand I do I... Never get out of you kills others why did the buffalo say when his son left going because were to! Youre going to be yourself, bad idea in your mouth, magic! To humans inspiration for your BROTHER will have you two smile now then! & nbsp2 look up to you take another route short guys as friends, the roastee back... A smelly dog wait! & nbsp14 life to be smart, otherwise youre just an ass the! & nbsp9 their homophobic views prefer animals to humans as you leave the room roasts to say to your best friend! Open and we love to hear from you, you should use them inspiration... 90 % of your beauty could be removed with a Luigi board, 7. ardiel 13. Im not an astronomer but I am allergic to stupidity, so go on, be... Can opener that doesnt work your bad personality is the best cool to. No reason two things: making us laugh and getting things from top... Mom has so many warts in roasts to say to your best friend face that it spells `` ugly '' in brail, jokes. Sharp-Tongued comebacks so many warts in her face that it made Mona Lisa smile one... Sorry for bothering you teeth look like parking slots I agree face, I prefer animals to.. -- the highway all at once I do when I enter, you deserve! Roasts add colour to your little friend & # x27 ; FAQEER #.